Pappa wants mamma naked
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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