I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
