I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
