I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
