i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
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