my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Randomize
