I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
