Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
