I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
