FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Randomize