She just used a chaser for red wine.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
