my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
