If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Let's paint friendship bongs
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
