Already got asked if we're dating
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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