I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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