so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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