If that was your dad, he is hot
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
There r osticjed everywhere
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
I have aggressive nipples.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Randomize
