we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
I woke up under a house in Key West
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