We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize