I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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