dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
