Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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