She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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