one might say we're banned from that church
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
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