Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Do vagina's smell?
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
