I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Randomize
