Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
