totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Randomize
