are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Randomize
