I met the friendliest cop last night
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
birth control should be required to get into college
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Rumble strips road head = magical
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
