i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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