I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
