Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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