i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
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