I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
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