Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
The cops high fived after they tackled you
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize