I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
