FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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