Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
