wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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