shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
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