the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
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