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How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
