How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize
