Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
