We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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