Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
