if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
whose ass print is on the piano?
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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