ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
