had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Randomize
